SHE

"SHE'S"

I am often caught in my own imaginary world
Often misunderstood as ignorant and cold
Come deep into my beautiful and creative world
Allow yourself to get mesmerized into it
Read into my thoughts and experience my soul
Listen with patience and you shall find joy with me
Understand me with love so that u may receive true love
I am who i am and i will always be
How i appear to be, i may not be
How i want to be, i may not become
But who i am deep inside me, i am indeed
Love me with thy heart so that i will be loved

10:01 PM

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

My thoughts:
I really miss playing the keyboard for the Lord in church...
Jus nice that, it's praise team's turn to lead worship...
and i onli get to wait for the coming month..
Seriously, it's my passion to play the keyboard...
Playing is one of the ways to express my Love to the Lord...
I jus gets excited all inside wen i know that i'll be playing...
but gets upset inside wen i dun get to serve for awhile...

My Frustrations:
Humbly, Me being a vessel for the Lord used to serve him
in the church to lead ppl to worship by playing, is not being made
used enough and not being stretched alot at all...
i get to onli play once per month...alternate month...
wen its seem awhile but makes me feel lk its been years i'm not
serving..i often felt so upset which not been known to ppl...
its lk "God i wanna serve u but why aren't I playing..SIGH..."
i feel a gust of air stucked inside of my lungs...
lk its clogging inside..we used to have combines and i enjoy
playing w the Shaloms..but now its not happening...
i kinda felt lk God is glorified thru the times we had
combine worship team..but probably man is not willing
due to fatigue..
(not directed at anyone nor blaming anyone jus letting it out)

My Emotions:
Everytime i listens to a hillsong thats piano solo...
i get so sucked into it..the beauty of that song...
the way e pianist expresses themselves thru e tunes and melody..
it really amazes me, makes me praise God for it..
and often wished i am playing it...

Recently:
I have a sense of need and urge to improve on my playing
so that i can express myself much much more while i'm playing
for the Lord during worship in church...so i tot i wanna educate myself
further in believer's music...i pray that if its God will he will provide me..

My Excitement:
The talent and Gift that God had blessed me has been increased
and developed by God for tis 9 years in church...
As now, he has made himself glorified thru me...
As even how much i can play now, it is asking to be
further developed to be better and much greater so as
God can use me further for much much more greater plan
he had in mind for me...i know that he can use me to magnify
himself to others...therefore the urge to want to
improve myself had increased too...

{Use Me Mightily Oh Lord}